What this community has taught me about being generous

People in our community are so happy to just give things away, rather than trying to sell them!  I was particularly struck by this when I saw a friend on Facebook trying to sell his stuff before he went overseas.  It was such a contrast in my eyes.  Fair enough if you need the money, but I feel like the students here probably do need the money, but they have an attitude of generosity and happily give their things away to other students.  

Just as an example: we've had two offers of a cot for the baby, and they didn't want any money for them (I asked!).  Someone is giving us her stick blender when she moves out.  We've had many offers of baby things that we haven't always been able to accept because we just don't have room for it yet.  And this is just a taste of the generosity of this community.  

And it has taught me to be generous too.

We have college friends who lives just outside our college community (down the road a little bit), but who are still considered part of the community.  I think they know us best and so often will ask us for help in the form of "Can I borrow some baking powder? I thought I had some but it's baking soda."  They also used our washing machine for a few weeks while theirs was broken.  

And a couple of days ago another friend from our community knocked on our door twice, the first time to borrow some cocoa powder, and the next time a muffin tray.  The other day a friend knocked on my door to ask for some sewing advice (not that I'm anything of an expert!), and then again later in the week to show me the finished product.

I'm not saying that I'm the fount of all help in our community, this stuff actually happens all the time between everyone.  Sometimes people will send an email to ask the whole community or sometimes they'll approach someone individually.  

I have realised that I love being asked to help. I love that people think to ask us for help. I feel that often people don't like to ask for help, or think that they are being inconvenient or a free-loader when they ask to use something you have.  Sometimes I feel like that!  But I actually enjoy helping people in this way.  So that has changed my attitude to asking for help.  

I remember a sermon I heard a few years ago, and the preacher said that being a good neighbour can sometimes mean asking them for help (rather than offering help), because it gives them a chance to bless you with the skills and resources that they have.  I can certainly say that I have enjoyed blessing my neighbours who have needed help.  

I'm now in the process of cleaning out our second bedroom to get it ready for the baby.  It's currently a study and store room so it really needs a big cull.  Occasionally I find myself wondering what I might get if I tried to sell some of the things I want to get rid of, but that's a rare thought.  I really want to be generous and able to bless my community by giving things away.  This community has been a blessing to us and that has in turn encouraged us to be generous, with our time, resources and attention.  I hope others around us can see this generosity and know we are Christians by our love (John 13:35). 

A Crowd and a Flashback

I hate crowds.  They make me anxious and grouchy.

Yesterday J and I went into the city to see an amazing light display.  But I’d forgotten that it wasn’t Sunday–night–before–a–work–day, but Sunday–night–before–a–public–holiday.  So there were people everywhere doing the same thing we were.  It was madness.  There were so many people in the city for this event that we weren’t allowed to get off the train at the closest stop but had to get off earlier and walk.  They even closed down a major road in the city for the pedestrians to use.

At one point I was bumped (and this is when I get grouchy), and it reminded me of a similar reaction I’d had before.  I was reminded because I’ve been thinking of doing a flashback series on reflections I’ve written in the past.  I recently went back to a journal that I used to keep and I read an entry about this exact thing.

So here it is, written by my 17 year old self (and edited for length by my current self):

Someone was mucking around in the clustered, confined spaces of the Year Twelve corridor and they caused a small domino effect; only bumping, no one fell over.  I heard my friend behind me offer an apology to someone but I didn’t say anything.  I was in a bad mood and it wasn’t my fault if I had bumped into someone because a few people were acting stupidly.  They were the ones who should apologise.

But does that really justify my thoughts and response? Most people have bad moods sometimes but I don’t think that means we’re entitled to act grumpy and rude.  So how should we express to others that we are upset without becoming completely self-centred or upsetting others in the process?

When I’m grumpy I often want other people to know it, I do become self-absorbed.  But what would be the right way to act when I’m grumpy?  Perhaps being grumpy at all is completely un-godly.  To not act in a grumpy way practically defeats the purpose of being grumpy.  Perhaps by consciously deciding not to act on your grumpy feelings helps you to stop feeling grumpy. Indulging in a bad mood may just serve to make us feel worse, even if we think we’ll feel better by expressing it.  Instead, we should cultivate the fruits of the Holy Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

There it is.  What do you think of my 17-year-old wisdom?  I think that’s something I needed to hear yesterday when I got grumpy from being bumped in a crowd. 

And just for fun, here are some pictures of my favourite building in the light show.

Suspend your morals while I tell you a story

Last night I watched a romantic comedy with a friend and I couldn’t help remembering something J said to me once (or maybe it was someone else, or I read it somewhere.  Anyway, I just remember the conversation I had with J about it).  I’ll tell you what it was in a moment, first I want to write about the movie. 

In the movie we watched there was this guy and girl, best friends, who clearly felt more for each other than friendship, but were always missing each other and were never able to be together until the end (…spoiler?  I haven’t even named the movie, but it’s a romantic film so of course they get together in the end).  All through the movie I groaned whenever one of them was close to telling the other how they felt only to find that the other was in a relationship with someone else. 

As I reflect, this movie wasn’t as bad (subjective term) as some romantic films.  Neither of the main characters cheated on their clearly-wrong-for-them-partner to be with their best friend (a.k.a. love of their life).  But both of them ended up with dissolved marriages before the end.  But that’s okay, right?  They can finally be together now. 

And I know there are other films where you as the viewer are waiting and hoping for a marriage to break up so that the ‘real’ lovers can freely be together.  Of course, the film makers always spin it to make it okay in our minds.  The marriage wasn’t happy, the spouse was having an affair, the spouse was…etc. (because it’s often the spouse’s fault).   

Here’s what J said:  Why is it that in movies we still root for the characters who have fallen in love, waiting and hoping for them to get together, when it is at the expense of a spouse or partner?  We want them to be together even if it means breaking up an existing relationship that one (or both of them) has.  Why are we okay with broken marriages in movies for the sake of ‘true love’?  Somehow we suspend our morals, not just our disbelief, when we get hooked into such a story. 

While I suspended my belief in the importance of marriage during this movie there were a number of other things in the film that did grate against my morals, and I noticed them.  Drunkenness (when does good ever come of it?), lying (this one especially grates when you just want the character to tell the truth about their feelings!), and sex outside of marriage (this one doesn’t always grate, particularly if it’s with the ‘right’ person, the love interest).  So I didn’t suspend all my morals.  But it’s not as though the film was asking me to endorse those things in the same way. 

More could be said on this topic from the perspective of the action or crime-drama genre.  Sometimes we suspend our belief that every life is valuable and murder is wrong when we watch these genres.  We may even suspend our views on justice if it means the bad guy gets caught. 

So what should I do?  Give up romantic comedies and just watch G-rated films (or no films at all)?  Maybe.  I don’t want my culture (or the pop-culture seen in films) to shape my morals.  But I don’t want to disengage completely from my culture either. 

I guess part of this issue can be dealt with by moderating the amount of input these things have in our lives.  As a Christian I get my beliefs and morals from what God says is right and wrong because I believe that he created the whole world and everything in it, including us, and so he not only knows, but made, the best way to live.  So the input of the Bible, God’s words, in my life should be far greater than any input I get from my culture.  In fact, the Bible should shape the way that I view my culture, and everything else. 

I’m sorry that movies can cause me to suspend my morals for the sake of the story.  But after it is over I remember reality, I turn again to look at God and ask him to shape me, knowing that I am a work in progress.  And maybe in the next film, whatever genre it is, I’ll see more of it through God’s eyes. 

When I didn’t want to pray

Last week at college we had week of prayer to pray for the mission teams that we would all participate in the following week.  This meant that we prayed more than usual in our morning chapel times and chaplaincy groups, usually in small groups rather than being lead from the front.  

At some point in the week I suddenly felt exhausted from praying.  I didn't want to pray anymore, I was tired of praying and it had tired me out.  

I was shy of admitting this here.  After all, I'm a Bible college student, I've chosen to study my faith full time, shouldn't I love praying?  Shouldn't I be good at it by now?  I shouldn't be feeling like I don't want to do it.  

But in case there is even just one other person out there who feels the same way as me sometimes, I thought I should share this.  And I want to be honest here not just about the good things, but the struggles too.  

I know I can come up with a number of reasons to explain away why I was tired of praying.  I'm an introvert and praying in groups for 20-30 minutes each day with people I don't necessarily know well, if at all, is emotionally taxing.  I'm also shy about talking in groups so often praying out loud is a push out of my comfort zone.  Then there's the fact that you have to reword and add-lib on the fly because simply reading out the prayer point doesn't quite feel like I'm praying sincerely (even though that's a totally legitimate way to pray, particularly with the detailed points).  

But honestly, I don't want to let myself get away with excuses for my attitude to prayer.  Prayer has often been hard for me, in groups and alone.  I know that I'm not alone in this.  Pray is hard, that's the truth.  It's hard to keep at it, to keep trying, because it feels so weird.  There's nothing else that we do like it.  And often we wonder what's wrong when we pray because we don't feel any different, as if feelings are the gauge of God hearing us.  

But my thought that day last week shocked me.  Because while I don't expect that I will always love praying, and I certainly don't expect to be good at it without a lot of hard work, I shouldn't let that stop me from persisting.  And I shouldn't want to opt out from doing it.  Prayer is our lifeline to God.  It is our expression of our utter dependence on him for everything, and a product of our relationship with him.  How can we have a relationship with God if we never speak to him (prayer) and if we never listen to him (reading the Bible)?  

It was my sinfulness that said I was tired of prayer.  And I know I'm not disgusted enough with my sin, but the shock at my sin was good.  I was glad it shocked me because it showed me that God is changing me, little by little, working in my heart to make it like his and to despise my sin and love his righteousness. 

We visited a mosque today as part of our mission, to learn more about Islam and what Muslim's believe.  I've often been impressed with the amount of praying that pious Muslims do (at least five times a day according to the rules of their faith).  But I shouldn't need rules about when to pray to get me to pray.  Paul says to pray continuously! (1 Thess 5:17).  I know that God has made it possible for me to approach him in prayer without any need for special words or special actions.  Jesus has interceded for me before the Father and made me clean.  Praise be to God.  I need to remember this and keep trusting in God for everything, knowing how much of a privilege it is to come to him in prayer.

O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear.
All because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer.

(“What a Friend we have in Jesus”, lyrics Joseph Scriven)

Thankful Thursday

Here are some things that I’m thankful for this week:

Electric Fans
There have been a couple of times this week when I’ve gotten home from a run or the walk from the train station and I’ve turned on the fan and just stood in front of it to let it cool me down.  The humidity in this city really makes it hard to cool down.  So I’m thankful for electricity and fans. 

Bible study
This week the women’s Bible study in our community started.  Over the past two years I’ve loved this group.  It’s been a great way to get to know the other wives who live here and to love and support each other.  There’s a different dynamic to a Bible study group when it’s all women and it has been wonderful to hear from different people’s experiences and wrestle with the Bible together. 

Harmonies and forgiveness
I didn’t know that I was rostered on to play the piano at women’s chapel this morning.  I should have known, the roster was emailed to me last week.  I just hadn’t integrated it with my diary.  So when I was almost at my train stop for college I got a call from someone asking if I knew that I was on music this morning.  Cue speed-walking from the station to college.  I didn’t have time to practice with the singers (I found out later that my lovely husband had been around earlier when they were waiting for me and had helped them practice).  Thankfully the one song I played was familiar to me and we couldn’t find the music for the other song so we sung it acapella.  And it sounded great!  We even had some harmonies going on.  I’m thankful that it all turned out okay, the singers forgave me and the singing was fantastic.  I love music. 

What are you thankful for this week?

That’s Christmas to me

A few days ago J and I watched The Polar Express.  I remember really enjoying it the first time I watched it several years ago.  I thought it was a sweet film with a nice message.

This time I found myself frustrated. 

The message of the film is essentially that if you just believe you can keep the magic of the spirit of Christmas alive for yourself.  But believe in what?  That Santa is real?  All the adults who watch this film know the truth there.  And what exactly is the spirit of Christmas? 

The truth is that Christmas is not about keeping the dream of Santa alive.  It’s not about ‘the spirit of Christmas’.  It’s not even about giving and family time, though we do enjoy doing this at Christmas time. 

Christmas is about celebrating the greatest gift this world has ever received.  We share the love by giving each other gifts, but it’s not even really about this.  God has given us the amazing gift of his son, Jesus Christ, God incarnate among us, Emmanuel.  Jesus humbled himself from his place as creator and ruler of everything to become a helpless, dependent baby. 

But it’s not the fact that Jesus, God himself, was born into this world that makes him the world’s greatest gift.  It’s what he did with his life that is significant.  He gave it up on behalf of sinners so that we would be forgiven.  It is because of what happened at Easter that makes Christmas important. 

On Sunday we heard a friend preach for the first time (which was exciting to be at) and he reminded us to remember the most important thing at Christmas time.  I felt particularly rebuked when he asked “would you feel like the day was less stressful if you took Jesus out of Christmas day?”  It certainly would make getting to things on time and having time to open presents with family easier if we didn’t go to church on Christmas morning.

I realised that Jesus isn’t often my focus at Christmas time.  Jesus gets about an hour of my day on Christmas day while I’m at church, and the rest of the day is about family and presents and food. 

As I was catching up with a good friend today we talked about this and both committed to putting Christ back into the centre of Christmas.  Here is one practical way we thought of for doing this: every present I open, every good bite of food I eat I want to remember that the gift of Jesus is even greater and thank God for him.  Hopefully this will help me to be more mindful of why we really celebrate Christmas. 

I’m interested to hear how others keep Christ at the centre of Christmas.  What do you do?

Confessions

Twice in two days I have heard two people, two men, confess to having pride.  And when it happened the second time it struck me that it was very brave for both of them to say so. 

Our culture doesn’t do this kind of confession.  Our culture doesn’t like showing personal flaws.  And definitely not by men. 

It’s because they are Christians.  Recognition of personal sinfulness is part of being a Christian, confession of this (sometimes to others, but always to God) is also part of being  a Christian.  But it still takes guts to admit it. 

The example of these two men has encouraged me to be real about my own sins.  I too am proud, though it may be in different ways than those friends.  And I need to recognise this and other things in my heart for what they are.  And I need to confess these sins to God, and perhaps to others too. 

I’m so thankful that I’m part of the Christian family that confesses sins and receives forgiveness from God.  That supports and encourages each other in personal struggles.  That doesn’t condemn but points to the cross of Jesus. 

If this hasn’t been your experience of the Christian family I am sorry.  Please don’t give up on us, or on God.  We are all sinners and we won’t always get love right.  I’m sorry for the times that I haven’t been this Christian family.  But I pray that God would keep making his children more and more like Jesus, including me. 

Reluctant stacking

Today I stacked chairs and I was annoyed.  But something else struck me at almost the same moment as I allowed myself to think these annoyed thoughts. 

We got to college a little early this morning.  The streets are quieter in school holidays so the drive from home to college doesn’t take as long as it normally does.  I heard the Friday chapel band practicing in our largest lecture theatre already and realised there must have been no 8am first year class today.  J told me there was none rostered this term. 

It’s the first years’ job to set up the lecture theatre for chapel.  We did it last year.  But when I went upstairs ten minutes before chapel was supposed to start the room had only just started to transform.  There were only about 6 people moving the tables and chairs, and it was definitely not enough people to get it done on time. 

I started to slide tables over each other, to stack chairs, and get a bit annoyed at first year.  It looked like there were only two first years helping out.  Why hadn’t they organised for some of them to be there to help out?  We organised this ourselves last year when we had no 8am lecture.  This isn’t the job for other years to do.  I shouldn’t have to be here, but there weren’t enough people as it was, so I had to help. 

I told these annoyed thoughts off almost immediately.  Why should I think that I’m done setting up for chapel just because I’m not in first year any more?  I shouldn’t resent service of others.  Doing this job is loving my fellow students and serving them.  But I love rules and allocated tasks so it’s hard for met to let others ignore them.  But in my annoyance I had traded the joy of serving others for anger at doing “someone else’s job”. 

I shouldn’t think myself above this job.  Christians are called to a life of service, and this was just one small way of serving others.  So I kept going, now with a better attitude.  Or at least without the anger. 

Ten minutes after I started I looked around and I realised how many people had come into the room to help out.  So many.  Many more than we needed to get it done.  And I realised it didn’t matter what year they were in.  I was filled with love for my fellow students.  People who are willing to help out even if it wasn’t their job.  And now I’m ashamed of my grudging service doing a not-my-job. 

Today was a reminder for me of my sinful selfishness.  My shameful self–centred nature.  And it was a reminder to serve, even when it means doing something that’s not my job.  In a way that’s the greater service, isn’t it? 

And how can I not serve when I have already been served by Jesus, who gave more than I could ever give to save my life?  I worship a Servant Lord who calls me to serve also.  I’m still learning to serve, but I trust that God is changing my heart in a way that I couldn’t.  A servant heart after my Servant Lord Jesus. 

Why you don’t have to believe your intuitions are the Holy Spirit

Or, How the Spirit shapes our hearts

This second chapter of ‘Good News for Anxious Christians’ is closely tied with the first chapter and addressed the question of what’s really happening when we listen to our hearts.

Cary’s basic argument in this chapter is as follows:

We sometimes have a gut feeling or intuition that we cannot explain.  Because we can’t explain it we often attribute this feeling to something from the Holy Spirit.  But sometimes our intuitions turn out to be wrong so therefore they can’t be the Holy Spirit. 

The fact is that everyone has intuitions, all the time.  Christians (who have the Holy Spirit inside them) and non-Christians (who don’t have the Holy Spirit inside them) alike.  Cary suggests that instead of thinking of our intuitions as the Holy Spirit, they are more like skilled perceptions.  Our intuitions are shaped by the set of skills that we have, such as a musician hearing a piece of music as sad.  These skilled perceptions often run faster than our ability to explain them.  But this inability is more about our lack of the necessary vocabulary needed to explain the intuitive feeling, rather than a sign that it is from God. 

But intuition isn’t completely separate from reason either.  It is not a process of reasoning, but the end result (even if you cannot explain the reasoning that got you to that point).  Because of this our intuitions are worth testing and arguing over because they won’t always be right. 

But just like in the first chapter, just because intuitions are our own voices rather than God’s voice doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t listen to them or take them seriously.  The Holy Spirit does work in our hearts, even though the heart and all the voices in them are our own. 

Cary then goes on to talk about a specific habit of the heart, just like the skills talked about earlier.  This he calls virtue, and it shapes our hearts, how we act, feel, perceive and think, just like other skills.  The fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22 are a list of virtues.  And like all habits of the heart they can result in intuitions.  But unlike skills that can lead to someone becoming a better musician or sports player, virtues are about becoming a better person.  This is why the Holy Spirit gets involved in them. 

This doesn’t mean that only Christians can have virtues but the Spirit does work in Christians to help them to become kinder, more patient etc. than they were before.  This shaping of the heart enables us and gives us the freedom to do new things.  The boundaries which shape a virtue are essential to the integrity of a good heart.  These boundaries aren’t restrictions to a person’s freedom but the source of new possibilities.  Just like the boundaries imposed by skills (like moving your fingers in the correct way on a violin) gives the freedom to play well and to play more complex pieces.  Spiritual and moral disciplines work in the same way. 

One of the freedoms of a virtuous heart is a new set of intuitions.  Christian virtues are all about following and becoming like Christ.  The Holy Spirit helps this happen in us, he sanctifies us.  So the intuitions of a sanctified heart are definitely worth listening to.  But we don’t have to pretend that they are the voice of God. 

Our heart won’t get sanctified by listening for the Spirit, but by listening to the word of God. 

This chapter has encouraged me to be more aware of the Spirit’s work, in me and in other Christians.  It has also increased my desire to have my heart shaped by Christian virtues by the work of the Holy Spirit.  And it has also encouraged me to test my intuitions and search for the vocabulary to explain them. 

Next up is ‘Why you don’t have to “Let God take control” (or how obedience is for responsible adults)’. 

Why you don’t have to hear God’s voice in your heart

So I’ve finally gotten around to starting to write about each chapter of this book.  Sorry for the wait, I promise this book is worth it.

In this first chapter of his book Good News for Anxious Christians, Cary writes about hearing God’s voice and trusting your own hearts.  He states that you don’t need to figure out which of the voices in your heart is God’s voice, simply because none of them are.   Listening to your heart gives us self-knowledge, and this is good to have, but it doesn’t give you knowledge of God.  To know God you have to listen to God, and this means listening to a word that comes from outside yourself – the Bible. 

The Bible says that  Christ dwells in our hearts by faith (Eph 3:17), but it directs our attention outside our hearts for what we should put our faith in: Faith comes by hearing and hearing comes by the word of Christ (that is, the good news about Jesus) (Rom10:17). 

We should be confident to name the little voice of wisdom in our heart’s as our own.  But often we label this voice as God’s in order to be able to take it seriously.  We think that our own voice or feelings are unimportant or wrong and not worth listening to.  This belief undermines our sense of morality, responsibility, and self-knowledge. 

Our hearts are largely shaped by what comes from outside them so it is important to hear the word of God properly preached and to take it into our hearts.  God does speak today, but it’s not in the voice of your heart.  God speaks through the Bible, which is his word.  This word gets into our heart and we repeat the word’s of God in our hearts, but this doesn’t mean that it is God’s voice.  God’s word shapes our hearts, but he speaks externally to our hearts. It has always been this way: God in his wisdom has chosen to speak to his people externally through the words of prophets, apostles, preachers and teachers.  

Cary also has some thoughts about how this idea of hearing God’s voice in your heart has gained traction which I won’t go into, you’ll have to read the book. 

This chapter was so warming to my heart.  I realised that guilt that I have felt for not hearing God’s voice is totally misplaced.  I was encouraged to memorise Bible passages so that I have the word of God in my heart.  This chapter has implications for decision making but that will be discussed in a later chapter. 

What are your thoughts about this?  Do you have any questions?  I’m very happy to chat about it so feel free to comment below this blog post.

Next up is ‘Why you don't have to believe your intuitions are the Holy Spirit’ (probably not until the weekend).

Look up with hope

Yesterday I heard a wonderful sermon in Women’s chapel from a friend and fellow second year.  She preached from Ephesians 1:15-23 and reminded us why we need to keep hearing the truths about God and the good news of Jesus.  And she blessed us by encouraging us with these truths.

Sometimes we know things about God and we can even explain them well, talk about them and write about them in an essay.  But do we really know know them?  Do they change our lives, our hearts, our focus?  We have to keep hearing the good news because we so easily forget.  We forget that God has saved us from the evil in our hearts, that he has forgiven us for our rebellion, that he loves us.  I have forgotten this. 

Look up and know the certainty of the hope that you have in Jesus if you belong to him.

I’ve been having a tough week.  Too many things have to get done and I don’t want to do any of them.  I want to just escape.  My friend’s words as she explained this part of God’s word to us were a soothe to my soul.  I have hope in Jesus, and nothing can take that away. 

I needed to hear so much of what she said. 

And then in the afternoon I heard another encouraging sermon from a friend in preaching group (one of my subjects at college).  She reminded me that God is sovereign.  That means that he is still in control even when I feel that there is no control in my life.  I grasped at this truth in the restlessness and chaos I was feeling. 

Thank you God for these sisters.  Thank you for these truths. 

The faith of an old man

Today J and I visited a man who used to go to our church in Adelaide.  He now lives in a nursing home, at the age of 99, because he can't really care for himself anymore.  Visiting him was such an encouragement for me.

He was excited and surprised to see us, not knowing that we were in Adelaide, and told us that he had prayed for us just this morning.  This man is an exceptional man of prayer.  His eyesight is poor and his hearing is going so he can't really watch TV or read a book (not even the Bible.  He now listens to it through headphones).  He told us that instead he spends his evenings praying, every evening.  I suspect that he spends most of his time praying really.  I couldn't imagine concentrating on prayer for that long, but hearing his commitment to prayer was an encouragement for me to keep working on my discipline for spending time in prayer.

He is very old and is eagerly awaiting his death so that he can go to be with God.  When I asked how he was he complained that he was too well!  But he expressed his trust in God's timing and he makes the most of the time that he has left. 

Here is one example.  He told us that he spoke to one of the cleaners who works in the nursing home and asked her if she loved Jesus.  The cleaner told him that she did, and he was so pleased.  When he found out she didn't read the Bible often he encouraged her that she needed to be fed from God's word.  Later on he gave her an old copy of a Bible reading plan and commentary notes, which she found very useful and encouraging. 

I always find myself encouraged after speaking to this faithful old man.  He always encourages us to keep loving and serving God, and his faith shines through in everything he does and says.  I can only hope and pray that God would create in me such a faithful heart.

"Good News for Anxious Christians" book 'review'

This book was recommended to my class at college this year by one of our Mission and Ministry lecturers.  I've been wanting to read it all term but never really got the opportunity until the holidays.  J read it during semester and liked it so much that we bought it. 

The sub-title of the book is 'Ten practical things you don't have to do'.  I haven't finished reading it but what I have read has been such a soothe to my heart.  I've decided that I'd like to blog through the chapters of the book and share with you my highlights.  Hopefully you will find it helpful, as I have, and perhaps are even encouraged to read it yourself. 

In his preface Cary describes his book as an attempt to 'preach the gospel of Jesus Christ to Christians'.  His introduction is about why trying to be Christian makes us anxious and how we can see God's commands in the Bible as freeing us from anxiety rather than producing anxiety. 

Cary attacks what he calls 'the new evangelical theology' which has introduced supposedly practical ideas to help us in Christian life but which are not Biblical, and actually get in the way of believing the gospel. 

These are the areas he addresses in each chapter:

1. Why you don't have to hear God's voice in your heart
2. Why you don't have to believe your intuitions are the Holy Spirit
3. Why you don't have to "Let God take control"
4. Why you don't have to "Find God's will for your life"
5. Why you don't have to be sure you have the right motivations
6. Why you don't have to worry about splitting head from heart
7. Why you don't have to keep getting transformed all the time
8. Why you don't always have to experience joy
9. Why "Applying it to your life" is boring
10. Why basing faith on experience leads to a post-Christian future

There's so much of this that I'm looking forward to reading.  I hope you enjoy learning along with me as I read this book!

When weeds look attractive

A few weeks ago I noticed that the vine in our backyard had started flowering.  The flowers were pretty little white things with a beautiful scent that reminded me of stephanotis.  So I did some research and decide that it must be stephanotis and I was quite please because the websites I looked at said it was really hard to grow, and because it reminded me a bit of home.  My Oma has some growing at her house and the smell reminds me of there.  Here’s a photo of stephanotis.

Yesterday our neighbour overheard J and I talking outside about the vine and warned me that it could be a cruel vine, well known by local councils to be a weed and a big nuisance.  He told me to look out for big pods growing on the vine and just kill it if that happens.  I told him that I thought it was a stephanotis but promised that I would keep an eye on it for the pods. 

So I thought I’d better do a bit of research about this cruel vine that I’d never heard of before.  I found this website.  I’d seen those pods before when we did a working bee last year in our college community spaces.  Someone thought they were choko, but the seeds inside behaved exactly like the website said.  The vine out the back did seem to fit the description in the website.  My heart started sinking a bit. 

Then I checked again at pictures of a stephanotis.  Of course, I remembered now that they had waxy, rounded leaves, and large clusters of long stemmed flowers.  My vine wasn’t like that…

So now I feel stupid for nurturing a weed.  I’d been trying to train it to run along the bamboo fence we have between us and the neighbour.  I’d been hoping to take a cutting to grow a new plant for somewhere else, but wary knowing that stephanotis was hard to propagate.  No wonder it had been growing so well without any help!

It makes me think of sin.  Sin is our rebellion against God our creator by living our lives our own way.  It is rejection of God and his words.  Sometimes sin can look attractive.  Sometimes it can look like it’s not doing any harm.  But it chokes the life out of us.  Unchecked it can grow and grow, without us even really noticing. 

This weed, that I thought was pretty, will remind me that sin is deceptive.  It will remind me to identify and root out the sin in my life.  And it will remind me that nurturing sin does not bring life.

If I were a millionaire…

Every time I think about writing this post I get the song “Billionaire” by Travie McCoy stuck in my head (actually until now when I looked up who sang this song, I thought it was “Millionaire”).  I don’t like this song, so I’ve shied away from writing this post.  But a grumpy off-hand comment from J the other day made me decided to write it. 

“Shelly, why aren’t we millionaires?”  I knew the question was rhetorical. 

“Why? What do you want to buy?”

“A new bike.  And new shorts!” 

J had been fixing his bike (again) and his shorts got dirty (again, and a different pair this time too).  The easiest solution would be to get a fancy new bike that wouldn’t break, but of course that would cost a lot of money.

I’ve had thoughts like this too.  If I were a millionaire I would buy a new wardrobe of clothes that suited me fantastically.  I’d pay a personal trainer/dietician to make all my meals and healthy snacks so I could still eat yummy things and not feel bad about it.  I’d buy a new car, with five doors instead of three (apparently the boot is counted as a ‘door’) so that our college neighbours could get in easily for the car pool to college.  I wouldn’t feel guilty about the expensive new running shoes I just bought. 

But we’re not millionaires obviously.  We don’t even have jobs!  We’re both students and we’re living off our savings (from when we did have jobs), and donations from friends and family (church and biological) who value supporting us in this way.  We’re also highly unlikely to become millionaires considering what we’re studying for. 

Sometimes I think having more money would make life better, easier, more secure.  But wishing for more means that I’m not grateful for what already I have.  We have a house to live in, money for groceries, dirt cheap clothes to buy at the college op-shop.  We also have friends and family and support.  Maybe life would be at little easier if we had more money than we knew what to do with, but we don’t, and I don’t think wishing helps in any way. 

Whenever I have those wishful thoughts about being a millionaire I will use them to remind myself of how grateful I am for what I do have, and I will thank God for all of it. 

Chinese New Year generosity

Friday the 31st of January was Chinese New Year and we were invited out to lunch after church this Sunday by one of the elderly Chinese ladies at church, Rosey.  She had booked a table in advance and invited people at church to join her.   I’m not sure if she had any particular people in mind, she just invited people until the table was full. 

So after church we were ready to go, but we didn’t know where we were going.  Rosey can be a bit hard to understand at times but she said something like “we’ll eat barbecue”.  Alright, sounds good to me.  She had an agitated moment after church that made us wonder if lunch was off and she should just go home.  But she was persistent; we were going to go and she was paying. 

She said we could just walk, it was close.  But then she had a sore hip so we decided to drive her.  Those who didn’t fit in the car opted to walk rather than take another car.  But we still didn’t know where we were going.  She would give us directions as we drove (and then we would text those who were walking to let them know where we went!). 

Once we got there, of course!  She had said “Wok and BBQ”, that was the name of the restaurant. 

When we were seated Rosey got busy diving through her three bags looking for red envelopes and money and pens and her cheque book.  The lady sitting next to her at the tabled helped to write the messages because Rosey couldn’t see very well.  Rosey gave an envelope to everyone who came, even if she didn’t know their names yet (and I had to look up someone’s last name on Facebook to write on the cheque). 

We ordered a few dishes to share across the table.  Well, Rosey ordered for us.  She has been there a number of times and the staff there know her now. 

When the fish dish came the waiter expertly split the fish and pulled out the spine.  We smiled into our plates of rice as Rosey confused the waiter with where she wanted him to put the fish spine.  On her plate?  No, she wasn’t going to eat it!  But not back on the plate! 

J and I were touched and blessed by Rosey’s generosity towards us in paying for lunch and her gift in the red envelope.  This experience has been a challenge to me about being generous, not just with my money, but my time as well.  Relationships require generosity and I look forward to the growth that results from this in our relationships at church.  Thanks, Rosey. 

Questioning “self-improvement”

Sometimes I think to myself, “you shouldn’t do this so much”, or “you should do this more”. Ways of ‘improving’ myself I suppose.  “You shouldn't laugh so loud”, “you should eat slower in company”. 

 

 

While some of the things I tell myself probably are good changes to make, not all of them are.  Some of them are simply things that I think would make me more agreeable to others.  They’re not good or bad changes to make, they’re just neutral. 

Then I wonder, shouldn’t I just accept myself how I am?  This is how I was made, why should I try to change that?  What’s so bad about having a loud laugh? 

But it is true that I should be working to better myself.  At least, I do want to be a better person!  Just as long as it’s in the right areas.  The areas that make me a better person, not the things that will make other people like me more.  “You should offer to help”, “you shouldn’t join in with the sledging”.

But even more than making myself a better person in the eyes of other people, I should be making myself a better person in God’s eyes.  Not all of ‘how I was made’ is good.  I, like all of us, was born into sin; it is in my nature.  And God hates sin. 

 

I should be getting rid of my sin, because I love God.  But actually, I know that’s not something I can do on my own.  It is God, not me, who makes me a better person. 

I know that my effort doesn’t count for anything with God, he has done it all and the only way to be saved is faith. 

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. (Eph 2:8-9)

It’s not being a better person that saves me, it is my faith and trust in Jesus, the only perfect person, who died in my place so that I could be free.  Thank you God for that. 

Service on CE Camp

J and I just got back yesterday from CE-SU Kid's Camp, something we've been doing together for a number of years now and J for many years before that.  CE stands for Christian Endeavour and SU is Scripture Union.  This camp we had about 80 kids and 30 leaders away for four nights with the aim of giving the kids a genuine encounter with Jesus and encouraging and equipping them to serve him wholeheartedly.

This was one of the pictures we used this year because we had a medieval theme.
Photo from cenetwork.org.au

J was the director, a role he also had last year, and I was a pastoral carer again.  This meant that I was available as a support for four leaders, stepping in to help as they needed me, or listening if they needed to talk about something, camp related or not.  If I wasn't busy with those things I found jobs to do, such as stray dishes, set up for the canteen, sweeping and cleaning and other things.

I love this role for a number of reasons.  Firstly, I get to pastorally care for people, which is exactly what I want to do.  I'm not sure how good I am at this yet and I do doubt myself sometimes, but I love the opportunity to listen to people, to comfort and support them and hopefully be helpful to them in the process.  I also like that the role of pastoral carer is so self-directed as I enjoy the opportunity to be working on this skill.  I really value this opportunity to serve and it's this that I want to write about a bit more.

A lot of the work that I do as a pastoral carer is unseen, or seen by only a few people.  I like this 'background' kind of service, not just because I am shy and don't like being up the front, but also because it prevents me from getting proud about my work.  There's something about hidden service that makes me feel closer to God.  Because I know that I'm not acting for my own benefit but for others.

This reminds me of something that the speaker talked about on camp.  Though I'd heard this before it was a good reminder.  He said that if you put Jesus first, others second and youself third, you will have true JOY in life.  I'm still working on this, I certainly don't always get it right and it isn't always easy, but serving at CE camp this year was a reminder of the joy that it is to serve others.

Why I enjoyed studying (at Bible college)

I've already talked a little bit about some of the perks of studying at my particular Bible college.  But those aren't really the reasons why I loved studying here.  In fact it has little to do with the college itself at all (though it is a great institution).  I loved studying at Bible college because of what I learnt, and am still learning (and who says I can’t vicariously learn more through J next year!).  It is the content that made it so enjoyable. 

 

Of course I also enjoyed studying with a fantastic group of people.  Studying at Bible college was so different to school and uni.  People looked out for each other, shared notes and study tips, prayed for each other.  It is easy to think, after a year of it, that all of this is normal, but it really isn’t.  I’m not sure I’ll ever be in such a supportive learning environment ever again. 

But it was what I learnt that made this year so valuable to me.  I learnt about the most important person in my life by studying the most important book in the world.  I've staked my life on what the Bible says, and I want to know more about it.  If I could study only one thing in my life it wouldn’t be the human body or brain, it wouldn’t be our planet or any of the things on it, it wouldn’t even be my husband or the streets of this new-to-me city.  It would be the Bible, because by it I can know God. 

 

This year at college I learnt how to understand the Bible better, not only by learning some of the ancient Greek language, but also by learning about different styles of writing, some historical background to both the Old and the New Testaments, and how Christians of the past have understood the Bible. 

 

I will be a student of the Bible for the rest of my life.  I will always be seeking to understand it and by this draw closer to God.  This year was a wonderful chance to do this in a more “full time” way.  Thank you God. 

A lesson in humility

I've often felt like humility is the opposite of boasting: being quiet about success, or even attributing it to God for extra spiritual points.  But I learnt tonight that it's much more than that. 

Tonight we had an encounter with our neighbour, the noisy one next door.  We were on our way out when he asked to speak with us. 

We stood there, unable to get a word in as he accused us of a lot of things that weren't true and lectured us about being respectful neighbours by being quiet on our stairs.  I got slowly angrier at his hypocrisy, arrogance and lies but didn't want to show anything.  It was a lesson in humility to listen to him and not defend ourselves and to apologise for not being quiet.  I shed my anger once we got into the car by telling J all the reasons our neighbour was out of line and pointing out his hypocrisy and lies. 

As I reflected later on I knew that there was nothing else we could have done.  Part of me wanted to argue back and tell him about all the noise that he makes and his disrespect of his neighbours, but I knew that wouldn't be helpful in any way and would just put him off side even more.  We took his accusations and apologised.  This is how I felt I should respond as a Christian. 

After all, we have the ultimate example of humility in Jesus.  Though he was mocked and scorned, Jesus never said word against the accusations thrown at him (Mark 14:55-61).  He humbled himself even to death on a cross.  And that is what saved people from sin and death, not a verbal defence against his accusers. 

I don't think I'm very good at it, I didn't like doing it, but God is teaching me humility.